Nothing to Say Here, Move Along

Microsoft doesn't need to dance around the Xbox 360's shortcomings.

The trouble with Microsoft's public relations, to paraphrase Willi Schlamm, is Microsoft's public relations. Mercury News reporter Dean Takahashi recently interviewed Todd Holmdahl of the regnant software company's Gaming and Xbox Products Group, and the transcript thereof is an exchange with a man from whom you would not extract a single crucial datum short of using a bright light and rubber hose.

Last July, I was so impressed by the performance of a friend's Xbox 360 that I purchased one of Microsoft's latest gaming console a few weeks later, in August, a year before planned. Am I satisfied with the product? Yes. The few games selected over the last ten months have maintained my interest, and relaxing evenings denote money well spent. Signally, the 360's user interface, called the "Dashboard," keeps me in close rapport with a few dozen acquaintances across the country, a number of us playing together or chatting or sending messages back and forth, as if each one were carrying on his hobby in a different room but not so engrossed that he couldn't occasionally walk across the hall.

Owners of the 360, however, likely know a peer whose console suffered hardware failure serious enough to bundle the unit into a package bound for factory repair or replacement by Microsoft. Maybe more than once. I am such a peer myself. What broke, I can't say — but on a Friday in April, my Xbox flashed and signaled terminally, and after guiding me through two attempts at revival, a support operator pronounced the ivory box faithfully departed.

Now — how was my repair? Smooth. The unit was quickly swapped at no charge, and when I made a phone call a few days before the replacement arrived, an East Indian woman genially provided me a tracking number that I had thoughtlessly misplaced.

What is out of order here, in the market, is that however happy a tale like mine, variations of it are being told pretty often. An informal, mid-May poll of 71 colleagues revealed that two-thirds of us, nearly 50, had their Xbox 360 go dead. Which of those ran into similar problems with the first-run Xbox? Not nearly as many. How many found his laptop, tablet or cell phone summarily become unusable? A rarity. Superstition was a point of humor, as those whose consoles were still working asseverated cautiously, as if wary of a divine ironist. It was accepted, though — grudgingly — that a unit would fail eventually. And, too, if so, not painlessly. My substitution cost nothing because my warranty has not expired; were something to happen two months from now, I would pay $135.

"There is a lot of anecdotal evidence that the quality of the Xbox 360 isn't there," said Takahashi, referring to the many experiences that telecommunications made confluent. "How can you paint the bigger picture for me there?"

Holmdahl either had not stepped outside of his office for two years, or prevaricated. "We're very proud of the box. We think the vast majority of people are having just a great experience. You look at the number of games they are buying," Numbers, could he give numbers for return rates? "We don't comment on that."

Takahashi: "If you have a high defect rate, won't that ruin the business model?" Holmdahl: "The vast majority of people are really excited about their product." Takahashi signed off with "We'll see if the real answers shake loose from other sources," which is the politic way to accuse someone of being politic.

A rumor holds that Microsoft fixed one of the problems Holmdahl wouldn't tell Takahashi about, and consoles so patched will be sent out when a malfunctioning one comes in. There is also a successor model, the Xbox 360 Elite, on sale, which has better electronic specifications. But not everybody will want to buy or trade for the machine they think they should have received in the first. Here is some advice: product support can be treated as a loss leader, with repairs of the 360, which appear to be serial, priced at only $30. Or less. The peculiar estrangement between Microsoft and its regular customers may not be reconciled, but the company's baffling ways can be read in the public less as What are they trying to hide? than What's the catch?

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